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£20k raised to help Waddesdon family who've been through so much

A wife reached out to a Facebook page for help and it's been overwhelming.

Published by Dan Gooding at 5:45am 10th June 2020. (Updated at 3:26pm 10th June 2020) 4-minute read.

£20k raised to help Waddesdon family who've been through so much

A brain tumour which won't go away, pneumonia, a brain haemorrhage and mini strokes - that is what a family from Waddesdon have had to watch their husband and dad go through.

The Bullivants started this 24 years ago, when Ian was first diagnosed and have faced it all with positivity and hope, as the tumour came back three times.

The last time was three years ago, when they were given 12 to 18 months before Ian would pass away, but the family fought.

Ian's wife Sandy even gave up her business to care for him, but recently it all got too much for her.

brain scan

She told us:

"Every time you brace yourself.

"I made Ian a promise in the very early days, 24 years ago, I said to him 'I will continue to fight for you, I will continue to battle for you, as long as you want me to. It's your decision, when you have had enough, when you want to call it a day, then and only then will I stop fighting your corner for you'.

"My friends and people around me seem e as being a very strong, independent [person] and you get to the stage where you need to let it out."

A call for help

The Bullivants
Sandy and Ian

They had seen their family home fall into disrepair and it just is not currently accessible enough for Ian.

Some days, Ian can't walk at all and Sandy has to teach him how to again. He can no longer get up the stairs, so he hasn't had a shower in months.

Sandy told us she turned to social media:

"So I was a member of a Facebook group, where I was completely anonymous and it just felt the safe place to be able to say 'I am not coping, this is what I'm facing'.

"A wonderful lady called Nicky, who lives in Leighton Buzzard, contacted us straight away and said 'You have hit a real nerve, we would like you to have your downstairs wet room, we are going to come and put a downstairs wet room in.'"

The Bullivants
Charlotte & Oscar with their dad

Nicky set up a GoFundMe page for the family and so far over £19,800 has been raised to make that project happen.

That will include making the kitchen wheelchair accessible, so Ian can manoeuvre himself in to be with Sandy.

'I will continue to fight for you, I will continue to battle for you, as long as you want me to. It's your decision, when you have had enough, when you want to call it a day, then and only then will I stop fighting your corner for you'.

A family effort

The Bullivants

The children, Charlotte (18) and Oscar (16), were meant to sit their A Levels and GCSEs this year.

They have been helping with physio and other therapy, giving up their lockdown time away from school and now their summer to look after their dad.

Sandy added:

"This year should have been their right of passage.

"They should have had the long summer they all had when we were young, just being children and instead they're carers.

"Both kids have said 'we won't go in September, you need the help, you need the support.'

"But I'm absolutely adamant that this is their time, they have got to go and make their lives now, find their way in life and find their moment to shine."

What's next?

The Bullivants

The work will start later in the month, but there is a call for help on site in Waddesdon for painting or tiling, for example.

Support in terms of tea, coffee and biscuits would also be appreciated.

Email the organiser Nicky here.

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